A loving personal relationship is on the forefront of the minds for many of us. Yet, chasing love may leave you feeling as if true love is ever elusive and unobtainable. This is because often our reasons for wanting love may be unclear. Perhaps you feel that you would be happier and your life so much better, if only there was someone to love you.
The thing is there is a difference between being needy for love and needing love. When you feel needy for love you may find yourself in relationships that are codependent. The kind of relationships in which neither partner is supported well. Relationships that are ineffectual and don’t really click.
So how do you attract a healthy and loving relationship into your life?
The key is: You! Bringing love into your life starts with yourself. Feeling needy for love is a signals that you are really needing love and approval from yourself. Afterall, you are the most important person in your life that you know to start the foundation of a loving relationship with.
The Love Mindset
To start have a look at your mindset. Do you often talk or think about feeling lonely? Do you often talk or think about how awful a current relationship is?
By focussing on the negatives or what is missing with your relationships you energetically place your creative energy into what is wrong. The Universal Law of attraction teaches that what we focus on expands. Therefore, if you want to bring more love into your life you need to focus on love that is already in your life.
You want to turn your thoughts away from the ‘problem’ and instead focus on thoughts and beliefs that bring solutions. Look at what you feel your limitations are to accepting a loving relationship into your life. Those underlying self-doubts. Do you believe you are good enough to have true love in your life?
A Loving Relationship – It Starts With You!
To look forward look at the relationship you have with yourself. Remember, you are the most important person you know. Therefore, the relationship you have with yourself is the first relationship you have to improve in your life.
As your love for yourself grows and your relationship with yourself improves you will start noticing changes: Your other relationships will start improving too.
Have you ever noticed the magnetic energy of someone who exudes happiness and confidence? Happy people are attractive. Like magnets they attract others to them. So, if you are wanting more love in your life, then start by loving yourself more first.
To love yourself means to be content with yourself. Yes that means positive self-talk instead of criticising yourself. It means no complaining, no blaming, no whinging and, of course, no choosing to feel lonely!
To get you started focus on that which make you feel good. If you need a starting point then grab a pen and paper and write down your positive attributes. What do you have to offer to someone else? What would you like someone to offer to you in a relationship? What is one action you can take today to give that to you in relationship to yourself?
From Loneliness to Fulfillment
Right, no that you are ready to bring true love into your life it is time to move into fulfilment thinking.
Think in terms of creating a loving atmosphere within yourself and in your external environment. Self-love is an ongoing process of showing the ever-increasing love you have for yourself to yourself. This means taking care of yourself. Pamper yourself. Treat yourself to romance. Create a welcoming living environment around you. Create an environment that inspires you and speaks to your soul. Show yourself that you are special. Treat yourself with love and care. Let all negative thoughts about love and relationships fade away. Instead think about sharing love, approval, and acceptance with everyone you meet.
When you can contribute to the fulfilment of your own needs you feel less needy. You become less codependent. It is like a mirror reflecting back to you how much you love yourself.
When you love yourself you feel calm, centred and secure. Your relationships improve. You react differently to people and situations that may have unsettled you in the past. You may notice new people and relationships entering your life.
Different Forms of Love
Remember everyone experiences love differently. There is no ‘right’ way to experience love. Some people experience love through feeling love in the form of touch. Others prefer to hear the words ‘I love you.’ Some need the demonstration of love, such as receiving gifts.
Be aware of how you prefer to experience love. This is likely also the way you feel most comfortable demonstrating love. With this awareness you can recognise the way in which someone is demonstrating love to you. It also shows you how they may be most open to accepting and recognising love for themselves.
Life Is A Mirror
Life ALWAYS mirrors back to us the predominant thoughts and feelings we have inside. What you put out there is what you attract back unto yourself. Actively focus on your sense of love and romance for yourself so that you can, in turn, attract the person who matches you energetically and can share that ever-growing sense of love, romance and intimacy with you.
So now that you are clear in your mind about relationships all that is left to do is to go out and meet people. Perhaps you might like to join a community class or a sporting team or a meditation group. Pick something you are naturally interested in. This way you open yourself to meeting like-minded people who have similar interests as you.
Remain open and receptive. Allow the Universe the space to bring to you those relationships and people that are right for you and in line with what is for your highest good. Think joyous and happy thoughts. Remember happy people attract people to them like a magnet. Be that magnet!
